What Do Kids Remember About Having a Working Mom?
As a working mom, I don’t get as much time with my kids as I’d like – especially during the workweek. Our days our full, our time together is often rushed, and mom guilt is an ever-present companion.
Don’t get me wrong – I know that being a working mom is the right choice for me and for my family. But as I juggle the countless balls that need to be kept in the air, and as my plate gets piled higher and higher, I do sometimes worry about what my children will remember from their childhood.
So, to my three wonderful children, when you look back at your childhood, this is what I hope you remember.
I hope you remember me being there. I’m rarely at your elementary school. I’m not volunteering in your classroom on a weekly basis, and there’s a good chance that many of your school friends and teachers wouldn’t recognize me as your Mom.
But I move mountains to be there whenever I can. For the big events – the midday Christmas concert, the Mother’s Day “spa day”, the first day of school – and for the small ones. I do everything in my power to be there for you as much as possible, and I hope those are the moments that you remember.
I hope you remember our enthusiastic end-of-the-day hugs, and forget the times that you had to be pried off my leg at daycare drop-off. I hope your memories of daycare include the friendships you made, the teachers you grew to love, and all of the exciting things you experienced – not the time you spent away from Mom and Dad.
I hope you remember us making the most of the time we spent together, and forget about the hectic morning rush as I hurried you out the door. I hope you remember the little moments of connection I tried to squeeze into every day. I hope you felt seen and heard, and knew that I would always make time for you, regardless of how busy our day was.
I hope you remember our family dinners, and our daily routine of discussing who had the best day. Sometimes, getting dinner on the table at a reasonable hour felt like an impossible feat, but we tried to make it happen as much as we could.
I hope you remember your Dad and I working as a team. I hope you saw both of us juggling family and work, and don’t think it was a task fell to me alone. I hope you noticed your Dad staying with you on sick days, doing daycare drop-offs and pick-ups, making school lunches and tucking you in.
I hope you remember feeling like you were the most important thing in my world, and don’t think for a second that title belonged to work.
That said, I hope you remember a Mom who chased her dreams, and I hope that instills in you the confidence that you can do the same. Especially you, my beautiful daughter. I hope you explore all of the paths available to you, and that watching me juggle work and motherhood doesn’t cause you to avoid mine.
I hope you remember me trying my best. I wasn’t a perfect mom – and I realized pretty quickly that I couldn’t be. As a working mom, I had to learn to prioritize what was important and let the rest go. I hope you understand why I made the choices I did.
Being your Mom is the greatest privilege of my life. I hope that somewhere in the day-to-day craziness of our lives, I let you see that.